Bullies Aren’t Evil; They’re Ancient and Very Predictable, Expert Says
SAN DIEGO, Calif. — Adult bullies seem to be everywhere in today’s world — in families, businesses, communities, online, and even in politics and between nations. It’s easy to dismiss bullies as jerks, hateful or evil, but only by understanding how their personalities work can people effectively intervene with adult bullying behavior.
In Our New World of Adult Bullies: How to Spot Them, How to Stop Them, Bill Eddy — therapist, lawyer, mediator and personality expert — explains how bullies manipulate others beneath their conscious awareness by using primitive emotional powers to immobilize victims with blame and shame or mobilize victims against the bully’s other targets. But this drive to dominate others plus the lack of internal brakes don’t make a bully unstoppable. Eddy provides a six-step strategy for overcoming a bully’s powers by:
• Recognizing a bully’s pattern
• Pulling the plug on a bully’s behavior
• Setting limits
• Imposing consequences
• Educating others
• Standing with others
“I wrote this book because today’s adult bullies use primitive emotional powers to activate fear, rage and loyalty within us without our awareness,” Eddy explained. “But once you know about these powers, you’ll realize they are hidden in plain sight, and you can avoid them or become less susceptible to them.”
Through knowing a bully’s predictable personality-based pattern of aggressive behavior and learning to be strategic instead of judgmental, readers can build confidence and gain allies to help decrease bullying behavior.
About the Author
Bill Eddy is Chief Innovation Officer of the High Conflict Institute based in San Diego, California. He trains lawyers, judges, mediators, and therapists throughout the United States and a dozen other countries in managing high-conflict family, workplace and legal disputes. He is the author of over 20 books and manuals and has a popular blog on PsychologyToday.com.
Our New World of Adult Bullies: How to Spot Them, How to Stop Them
Publisher: HCI Books
Release Date: June 11, 2024
ISBN-10: 0757325106
ISBN-13: 9780757325106
Trade Paperback, 288 pages
Available for pre-order wherever books are sold
Praise for Bill Eddy’s Our New World of Adult Bullies:
“Our New World of Adult Bullies is timely! Anyone can be bullied. Bill Eddy explains not only the damaging toxicity and effects of bullying but the psychological understanding of how to stop it. Poignant examples from history and everyday life, bring it home. This book empowers and offers solutions instead of reactions. Much needed in a time of great divide and polarization.”
Karyl McBride, Ph.D., author of Will the Drama Ever End? Untangling and Healing from the Harmful Effects of Parental Narcissism
“As always, Bill delivered a book that is easy to digest, and full of practical insights and advice. Make the decision to take back your power. Start by reading this book.”
Catherine Mattice, CEO, Civility Partners and workplace bullying expert
“Bill Eddy has had a long and distinguished career as a mediator, trainer, and author. He brings this experience and wisdom to his latest book. Having read the book, I feel more confident with not just identifying bullies but more importantly how to pull the plug on bullies. Given the heightened levels of divisiveness and polarization in society, this book couldn’t have come soon enough.”
Steven P. Dinkin, president, National Conflict Resolution Center
“Crystal clear, eye-opening take on the bullies in our lives, whether at work, at home, or in our culture. Eddy’s easy-going conversational tone belies the solid science that drives his ideas and spot-on practical advice. Learn how to recognize bullies, understand how they get into our heads, and how to evict them.”
Dr. Richard A. Warshak, author of Divorce Poison: How To Protect Your Family from Bad-mouthing and Brainwashing
